wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
Her facebook status is 'PERCS ON DECKKK~' which is probably why she still lives with her parents.
you kept saying "no santa, im not having sex with you. it's not your holiday".
The assistant vp has a bottle of wine on his desk & I have a feeling my boobs will be making an appearance today.
We had three bowls going. It was a tri-bowl tournament. Harry potter shit.
If I have to masturbate more than twice a week you fail as a fuck buddy. Just so you know...................you failed
Hell hath no fury like a woman whose gay sidekick you insult
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
My dad just told me I can't passout in the driveway after the 4th of July parade this year, again
I dapped up a cop while leaving the party
I cried while dry heaving in the back of the car to the New York song with jay z in it. I was singing it inbetween gags.
How many fucks given?
0.12846
I know! It's like he knows when my vagina wants to misbehave!
I think we have some hyper-understanding of each other when drunk, because looking back at our text convo from last night, they were literally just jumbled letters.
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
Randomize
