moral of the story: I'm going to stab everyone
She told me that she faked her orgasm. Does she think I care??
No I am not eating basil off your cock
Did my good deed for the day.. Helped an old guy hide his beer on the NJ transit while the ticket lady came by
If you really wanted to hide the fact you were gay, you could have at least had the sense to not get drunk in the same bar as your bf.
Just saw some dude tumble down the stairs of the bar while leaving...fist pump...and then sprint down the road
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
I'm washing down the sadness with shots of vodka.
"Do You Wanna Build a Snowman" came on while I was riding his dick. I had to take a moment.
We were wearing togas. So having sex was really easy to do without taking any clothes off.
Cheese, the small of a woman's back, the universe, mountains, vampiric demons, sleep, and dreams.
And I mean really who loses their phone in a tree
I'm tired, but I'm gonna go with "I watched the debate last night and part of my soul died"
did i get sucker punched in the face last night or was our make-out session just that intense?
The text I got from my boyfriend this morning: "babe, I'm not mad because I know you were drunk, but you kissed 3 guys last night and I wasn't one of them".
Randomize
