I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
Ive never seen someone more dtf than a soaking wet drunk girl who stumbles into your backyard.
she is the kim kardashian of front butts
I found out why they kept calling her "CD". It was short for "Crab Dip". You're fucked.
It's ok for me to have his baby but I can't be his friend on fb. Wth is wrong with this
Roommate is high and swore off off the diet. Said she wants to make everyone else fat since it'd be easier. She spent today baking 3 dozen brownies for the office tomorrow and is already down to 24.
The only people in the library at 5:00 on the friday after finals are homeless or pre-med.
Halfway through she said I was exactly like she imagined. So many things have been stroked this night.
Sorry was covered in semen when you texted me. Just walking back from the Harvard Club
All you needed to say was one of those sentences and the other would've been implied.
the worst part about living alone is not having other peoples snacks to mooch off of when you havent gone grocery shopping in three weeks. i'm so pms-y i'm about to eat a soy sauce packet
You whispered 'For Frodo', handed me your shirt, and charged campus security.
Woke up to find that I was cock blocked by no more than three people.
There's a pregnant girl taking shots of apple juice
Once you start using "cuddles" as a code word for sex you'll never get real cuddles again
Randomize
