he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
We went to red robin and there was a 15 minute wait so we went and fucked in the car. Quickies, endless fries, and a mascot handing out balloons- this is literally the night of my dreams.
i just hugged the lady at the liquor store goodbye for the summer...
She gave me a bj in her parent's kitchen while I ate the rest of her mom's birthday cake. Fuck. Yes.
she played "i just wanna get married" by jagged edge while we were having sex. why cant i avoid stage 5 clingers
Had a farmer come into my class to talk to us today. He apparently met his wife on fb and just thanked jesus for his land. I think I am in the wrong major...
It's like a bag of dicks covered in taint sweat pounding a pregnant baby walrus.
He offered to take my unemployed self out for drinks, but I really just want him to buy me the Beyoncé album
I was gonna start crying but as he was asking me for my info i saw him eyeing my rack. So I sorta started pushing them together. He asked me to get out of the car he made me turn around so he could check me out and then he said and I quote "okay ma'am. Everything is fine, I'm going to let you off with a warning. Next time if you're not wearing yoga pants you might not be as lucky" I am blessed.
This summer has already been like the best summer ever. FREEDOM IS AWESOME. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND GOD BLESS THE SINGLE LIFE.
I used an explanation of Walking Marriages in the Mosuo Culture to successfully negotiate an open relationship. That Anthropology degree is finally starting to pay off.
we are currently pregaming for our walk to the liquor store.
step one: admitting you have a problem. complete.
So your telling me I can lick your ass but you CAN'T spend my money
My bookbag can hold 30+ beers. They shoulda put that on the tag bc its a big selling point
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize
