i hate that you can chart my weight gain through my facebook pictures.
So I was just looking through the calendar on my phone seeing what day new years was on & on dec 31st at 9am it says "nude champagne toast". Guess we have to do it.
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
You NEED to get fingered by a violinist. He used his left hand and make me cum, he's RIGHT handed.
shes perfect for him. shes never seen a penis so she has nothing to compare his to.
Now for something completely different: ive figured out how to eat a banana without insinuating something completely naughty
Good. We don't answer calls at dick thirty.
It's a hurricane, not a zombie apocalypse. WHY DID YOU BUY SHOTGUNS?!?!
We got the DJ into it too! "If there are any dudes into other dudes out there, my man mark is looking to get pounded. Buy him a drink stat!"
TIL a potato cannon can be loaded with dildos as ammunition. Boy, do our neighbours love us!
Last night he ate BBQ Pringles out of my boobs...I feel like it was moderately productive
sometimes it's just necessary to be your own gyno when you're too afraid to tell your mom about your real life
how come you came home with "Amanda owns this" written on your forhead
Its guy fieris flavor town of suffering™
You have a full penis tattoo of a cobra fighting a mongoose, don't you?
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