Did u know that at any givin time there r 46,948,952 drunk people in the world? Were not alone
Maury Povich's contact info is in our database at work...i should steal it right?
Um, I don't really remember much about the event... and then I woke up on the metro..
it was like fucking with batman, he had gadgets i never even imagined
I wish i could be on x for the rest of my life.
There is a 15" subwoofer mounted inside our fridge. I've never been more proud of myself.
A man bought two 40's from me, then asked if I had duct tape. How do people over 50 know about Edward 40hands? It was very weird.
I rocked my own world, he was just a prop.
Please make sure you have solid number of friends around you that wouldn't be afraid to break a bottle and stab someone. If you're planning on drinking all of that, you're going to need a safety net.
I'm a bit offended I got no nudies back but it's whatever
They're in the mail. Snapchats too fast. I want the suspense.
So, I'm a little drunk in Seattle with Glenna, but we've all agreed that it's patriotic to think about Bill Clinton from time to time during sex. 'Merica
Oh no that was the time I did the walk of shame with no shoes
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
have fuck
*fun
actually forget it have a fuck too it'll do you good
All I'm saying is there better be a bow on your dick for my birthday
Randomize
