Dont worry, she is sitting right next to me. She is making it clear she wants to scissor
this morning i woke up with my panties on and i knew where i was. success.
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
a kid who worked there came up to me and let me know you were sitting in the bathroom sink. he said it was fine, so i just kept checking on you.
you came home soaking wet, and when I asked where your umbrella was, you pulled it out of your bag and were so proud you kept it dry.
I walked down to the adult beverage store and got two bottles of jim beam and s shooter of crwon black label because we didn't have any Tylenol
Fuck that must be a crazy sunburn.
Just rescued a super cute pair of Gucci heels off the sorority lawn on my way to work. Things are worth two paychecks. Fuck trust fund kids.
Let's not refer to him as Dustin. That makes him seek like a real person, not just a dick I would like to experience.
Come my child we shall walk thru the pasture of amazing sex and corndogs. Hint:some corndogs are not corndogs.
Do you remember me making bird noises at the bartender with some guy at the bar last night?
Can you bring home bongs? Like all the bongs. I need bongs
Just got offered a dog by two Meth head's one of which wasn't wearing shoes and continually saying "fuck"
I mean it could have been worse, I could have been sober.
I lost all interest the day she banged that guy in the Amazon parking lot. That's a special kinda whore.
How ya feelin' champ?
Like a million bucks that was soaked in alcohol.
Randomize
