We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
Heated debate on which is worse. Pissing your pants or puking all over yourself
The stripper had a daughter my age and offered to introduce us. I didn't know what to say to that.
Whatever, the fact of the matter is that I saved you from poorly planned outdoor sex by doing a rain dance and you should totally thank me.
Where the hell is he. I called him crying for weed and sex you would think that would signal some urgency.
Witnessing a crazy lady on the bus screaming about how romney is one of the four horsemen of the apocalypse.
TIL a potato cannon can be loaded with dildos as ammunition. Boy, do our neighbours love us!
There is a 97.5% chance that my sketchy roommate is also a hooker.
So when can I meet her?
He described his sex dream about me using only emojis
My roommate is fucking his gf in the shower and i really have to pee do i just bust in or pee on his bed
i feel like i shouldn't just had to send a text that said "no i will not eat your ass"
You can’t homewreck what the Lord hath brought together.
who knew being a fake dominatrix could be so fun?
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
Randomize