I'm drive I can fine osifer
Don't interrupt me, I have a limited time to be high and thus be remarkably good at Pac Man
He tricked me...the first song on his sex mix was trey songz but the rest were techno....i can't walk straight now
She thought someone was breaking in but when I said it was me she got even angrier and threw a coffee mug at my head.
It started as a joke and ended with a trip to the emergency room, a broken macbook and a gigantic hole in the concrete of my driveway.
I'll see ya tonight at your house...and I'm bringing you a special treat that starts with a V and ends with us eventually going to rehab one day.
Bro I can't jerk it to my phone anymore. I feel Siri staring back, and she's real disappointed.
Well he just said "there's glass on the floor and it's okay I'm only bleeding out of my esophagus" so yes he's tripping
FYI, grandma is already drunk and using a bed sheet as a table cloth.
I feel like drug tests are a little less "random" when you are employed by your father.
It was just...long. I started around 2. And I think i went to bed around 2. So 12 straight hours? I remember a milkshake and frozen grapes.
The fabulous human disaster: it is him
Why is there cereal literally EVERYWHERE?
It didn't follow directions.
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
it's 1:30pm and i'm eating cheese while i sext. i need hobbies
Randomize
