Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
All i remember as you were making ramen is that you kept slurring "i like you as a color"...
the nurse was shocked when I handed her a cup of green piss. what did she expect giving me a drug test on st. patty's day?
i dont feel like going...you don't know how much work goes into getting my whore on
all i remember is that her bootyshorts said 'shameless' and that there was no turning back.
we ran out of cups so i finished the night drinking out of a paint can.
You need to always be prepared. Like a sex firefighter.
Now that I'm hitting my bong, I realized I haven't missed something so much in a long time. I love Thomas the Dank Engine.
Am I allowed to compare getting cum'd on the face to a warm summer rain?
It's really sad that I'm trying to calculate in my head the type of place to have dinner that's worth anal
I have a spatula mark on my ass. He spanked me with a spatula. Take that Rachel Ray.
I didn't think this needed to be said, but our sexts are an emoji free zone
I've never SEEN someone give negative fucks before. It's actually rather impressive. I want to study under them.
I heard you ran into my sister lastnight. Do you remember making out with her and slapping my uncle?
i am risking my non lesbian vagina for your needs. i better be the best friend you ever had
Randomize