How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
Did we have sex last night?
I think that was the general idea until I got you undressed and you puked on me.
I woke up to him climbing naked through my bedroom window with a bottle of jd in his hand. Of course I had sex with him.
just bought 2000 rhinestones and a heart shaped stencil at Micheals...I think the cashier knows i'm Vajazzling
btw my roommates send a round of applause to you and that guy you tried to fuck on our wall. Additionally they hope he got it in.
He was banging holes in the kitchen wall with pots. They tried to pull him away but only managed to pants him. He kept "drumming".
Truth be told I was googling "why is my left calf bigger than my right calf", porn would've been a better excuse for a virus.
I made this pact with my vagina, though. No more heartless fuckery.
All i really wanna do tonight is get drunk with you and dance on tables. is that too much to ask?
Because its Monday... And I'm determined to just be drunk for the rest of the semester
Well, we could've been at the bar taking a shot everytime my rash spread. But Noooooo. You had to go out with your non- girlfriend. Lame.
There are Vine videos that have lasted longer than he did
I'm floating on a 30mph cloud right now not giving a fuck
Is it possible to hurt your vagina working out, because I think my Dumbass accomplished that... 😯😟😒😓
Do I even want to know?
I'm a delicate orchid of a man.
Blossoming into a fierce dragon.
Randomize
