He gave his mom his old phone, and I am SO paranoid
Did you send adult things?
Um. Yes would be the understatement of the year
what made you think it was a good idea to trust the girl that hides tequila in her backpack?
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body.
And by sexy pictures I mean pictures of my penis in strange places. I rock out with my cock out.
I've been trying to brush my teeth for 20 mins now... Mother of hangovers.
That's the best thing about having gay dads, you don't gotta do shit on mothers da and everybody is down wit getting wasted on mimosas at brunch
how did you know i stayed over last night?
there was a trail of glow sticks and cheetos from the front door all the way to his bedroom
It's not that I even wanna fuck these guys anymore, just cuddle that's all. My conscience has never been so proud.
If you set your screensaver to be a slides show, make sure you remove dick pics first. This lesson 1 of living with your great aunt
He said he's in to distance fucking. I thought he just mean long durations. We fucked on a towel all the way down his tile hallway accross his kitchen and into the living room
Put a Santa hat on my junk. He's wants to be festive too.
I think I came out of my blackout as I was ordering wine from the private wedding reception.
idk he wanted to trade sex for a triple order of hashbrowns
AND YOU SAID NO?????????
I just snorted sandwich everywhere.
I hope it smells nice :)
IT DOESN'T BECAUSE I HAVE MEAT COMING OUT OF MY NOSE, DAMNIT.
Randomize
