Do you reaalllllly want to put "porn editor" on your resume?
i wanna make it FB official so he cant fuck anyone else. but that means i can't fuck anyone else either. CONUNDRUM
By getting ready I mean putting baby powder in my hair and possibly changing my pajamas to another pair of pajamas
I went golfing for the first time today!! Aren't you proud?
Driving a golf cart around all day with a keg attatched to the back doesn't exactly count as golfing
He thinks MY vagina is tight. That's saying something.
Just found a picture of a hobo making out with her tits...a HOBO
Well he has a girlfriend. So I told him that I wanted to have sex way more than I wanted to be a decent human being.
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
I feel like I ran a fucking marathon on my knees last night and there are bruises to prove it.
Yeah it'll definitely be worth it. Not having syphilis all the time you know
So the name of the kid from the sponsor a child comercial popped into my head while I was masturbating this morning. Needless to say I will now be now be donating out of guilt.
also, made a drinking game out of my birthday photos....drink everytime alcohol is in a photo. going through all 350 of them.
Ok, in complete transparency, I am eating a cookie on my bed naked while reading a Halo novel.
do you remember your solution to not spill your drinks last night? .. Shots, that way you wouldnt have time to spill them. i love your drunken logic haha
I'd kiss your neck and collarbone and then run my tongue up your neck to just behind your ear
And then lightly kick the curve inside your ear
Randomize
