Do ugly people know they are ugly?
The quiet ones do.
When she sits down, she uses her fat rolls like an arm rest.
I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
Michael Bay is the white Tyler Perry.
Why does my right nut always hang lower than my left nut?
Your dignity remains intact. He, on the other hand, is completely convinced he slept with your cat.
it was either that or behind a dumpster, and i am way too pretty to pee behind a dumpster
She's an ex-convict. She actually got stabbed in the face with a pen while in prison. No big deal.
He was drinking hot tub water because i refused to get him a glass of water...
Note to self: You can't deep fry cheese-its.
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
Walk of shame dressed as a Christmas tree, it happened. Ho ho ho bitches
No, it's cool, I just bounced from the hospital. I was...talking to a security guard, maybe?
She definitely peed in a bucket in their closet last night. We should warn them about that, right?
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
Randomize
