In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
I may or may not have started my period at the bar. Good thing I have dark jeans on.
is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex
Your dignity remains intact. He, on the other hand, is completely convinced he slept with your cat.
hes wearing the same tie today that i tied him up with last night.i wanna go home
Just signed my boyfriend up on a dating website so I could officially have a reason to leave him for my hot neighbor.
I just got peed on. This karma circle is starting to get vicious.
It's like all my brain cells are screaming at me.
I'm dying.
I seriously think I may just have to live here. In this bed. Naked.
i fell out of the car and didnt spill my drink. come overrrr
truly a win in your book
He hasn't responded in 6 hours and the last thing he sent me was a picture of 7 grams of coke. I'm getting kinda worried
I am now "wine pairing" tums flavors with my strongbow, because apparently hard cider gives me heartburn.
Riddle me this: How does one check in at the Marriott, but wake up at the W?
I am that special "drink water and be grateful I'm alive" kind of hungover
Did you have a good sleep?
if a good sleep includes waking up cuddling a bottle of wine I had a GREAT sleep
Randomize
