i need a new camera phone. my pictures from last night are as blurry as my memories. and neither tell me why i woke up in an airplane hangar.
so i told him i have my period and he put his head by my vagina and said "I HATE YOU!"
the bar told me i would have to take an hour break so they could wash the shot glasses
It'll be like the burning bush except without moses and with pubes.
I am literally hand feeding my crying ex boyfriend taco bell. What has my life become?
I kept petting the scarves and telling customers to "feel that shit"
Stop drinking at work.
So how much of last night are we going to pretend never happened? Enough to stay friends?
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
The best was when you were crying, and trying to get the bouncer to "understand you AS A HUMAN BEING"
Just passed the animal clinic parking lot I had to pull over to puke in during welcome week. I can almost hear the dogs barking at my shame again.
I sign my lease Thursday, I'm about to be released back into the wild.
I'll make missing person signs.
You're a good friend.
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
yeah it's a weird friendship. we pretend that we're automatic besties but i know we both know i slept with her boyfriend
Lunch?
Massage?
Spanking with handcuffs?
Just flash them and yell "JUDGE THESE BITCHES"
Randomize
