I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
and you said cock pushups were impossible
you just can't say no to drugs on a mirrored table.
You said "It's ok guys, I know I'm not really a turtle" and then tried walking on the lake.
My god. His mom just smacked my ass. Does this mean I'm accepted??
Yesterday was just the icing on the rejection cake that was my week
I found out he put two potatoes in a jar because he wants to make his own vodka.
I'm surprised I didn't lose anything last night. Except maybe my dignity but other than that we gucci.
It's time to run my sex life like a basketball team. Got the lesson Clint!
He's been watching the World Cup too much because right before he came he screamed "NUT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" for half a minute. Our landlord is not happy.
The best thing about this time of year is that all I have to do is add a random mardi gras decoration to my cart full of alcohol and boom, no more judging
premonition: im going to wake up covered in mashed potatoes
I responded with revoking his blow job privileges. Needless to say, he's learned his lesson.
Nice. I got home at like 3am.stopped at Walmart for a vacuum and weirdly a trash can. Not sure why high me last night needed a new trashcan.
It took like and hour to get him in me and then he came in like 2min. Size aint everything
Randomize
