Jake died.
WTF????????? That's how you tell me????
Oops typo. Jake cried.
I'm home alone watching The Hills seasons, eating pickles and drinking straight rye. I just googled "how to make friends". Probably not the most pro-active solution. Help.
kindergarten is hard when you're hung over.
having sex with you is like teaching a dog to tango, it DOESN'T work
She was asian and in a relationship... my two weaknesses
Last time I saw him the sun was coming up and he was asleep in the student wellness parking lot. For some reason people were peeing on him.
Any idea who the guy in my bed tagged as rattlesnake dick might be?
He came out in cowboy boots and underpants holding a beer while he hugged my mom. I love Montana.
Do not deep throat a rocket pop, it WILL go into your lungs, and you may die.
He held the kayak still so I wouldn't tip over while projectile vomiting. If that ain't true love, I don't know what is...
You aren't truly friends with someone until you play drinking games via text at 8:30 in the morning.
8 stitches. Next time I decide to twerk while doing a keg stand, stop me.
Just got recognized as black out drunk girl. I'm never going to live that down, am I?
first he passed out on the toilet...then hugged it and screamed no no no as i tried to pull him out
Walked off the dance floor to find Gabe hitting on a dad bod at the bar. It was my Dad. Awkward is an understatement.
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