Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
well..after leaving the bar you handed me your wallet and said you didnt need it cause you were going to find the cash cab and added 'i'll see you on tv'
It got awkward when the girl working at planned parenthood continued to hit on me, after she knew about my STDs.
hotel security told us you walked into the hotel with blood all over your dress, weren't wearing any underwear and were escorted back by three men who were believed to be "homosexuals".
Oh my god please beg your father to turn the car around so you can possibly get laid by a knight at medieval times.
Were you paying girls to come up and grab my cock and tell me I look like bradley Cooper?
Just met another girl you fucked but this time in seattle. Your cock gets almost as much mileage as jet blue. Anaheim and seattle both say hi, figured you don't remember their names.
We just laid there in bed together, petting his dick and repeating, "IT FEELS LIKE VELVET!!!"
Returning my drunken purchases from last night. Not a single thing I bought was on sale.
I want to go to a gay rodeo for my cross country road trip. It'll be like my very own homo country boy pilgrimage to the holy land.
We duck taped Dave to a rolling chair and shoved him in the bed of the truck then took off for a bit.. We didn't explain it that way when the nurse asked what happened though.
Dude. I don't even want cuddles. I just want an acknowledgement that I just had balls in my mouth.
Due to this morning's events my new porn name is Reepa Nipplov.
If I have put a neon “vacancy” sign on my skirt for him to get the picture I will.
Randomize
