Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
I heard you threw up in your lap?
I heard that too.
can't believe I ate straight coffee grounds to stay awake for that
Ya know, years from now when that kid is old enough, I'll get to regale him with the story of how I was his father's AND uncle's first gay experience.
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
Do you remember calling me and dedicating a shot to me?
You threw a bunch of trashcans into the middle of the street and nothing happened. I fell on one car and suddenly there were cops everywhere...
So that'd what fifty dollars of chicken at 7/11 looks like. Made it to work on time. Puked twice. BOOM.
He was the one that got away. From my vagina.
I remember nothing except the fact it happened and I ate doritos and we highfived a lot
No more margaritas for you. Also, tequila should be reclassified as a hallucinogen.
It's like the bat signal. He only texts me when I'm naked.
I remember grabbing your ass. So firm. So right. I don't regret it.
I don't think I used nearly enough fucks in my reply to convey the level of fuck him.
I hit an all time low we ran out of coke and I met up with my dealer at 8 in the morning for a re-up. great customer service though.
Randomize
