I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
you definitely held a convo with a hobo
we have a secret handshake
My grandmother just explained bulimia to me as a diet
last night you decided it was time to "get organized" and "straighten out your life." You pulled out a bag of troll dolls, sorted through them and got nostalgic. You demanded both andy and i take one and keep it forever.
There was a picture of him proposing on the night stand and their dog watched, but I can't help myself, his dick is just so perfect.
I'm truly not mad that he's at a strip club, it's that he couldn't look far enough into the future to figure out how to get himself home from one
I cut myself stripping on your car. Probably a profession I shouldn't pursue
I masturbated to my balding thirty-something co-worker last night. I am a new level of lonely.
VAL. THIS MOTHERFUCKER IS LAYING IN MY BED WEARING A CAT SHIRT, VAL. COME SAVE ME, VAL.
She looks like a hot George Washington...I'm going for it
So i had a lucid dream about blowing myself. This is why people love me
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
You ruined a cute cat because your lack of horniness
Haha. I found pics last week of me getting motorboated by a girl while i was taking a shot. Hahaha in my wedding dress. Classy
Dammit. the window insulation sheets are too small for my windows. Yet again I am disappointed by size
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