But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
she was so hammered she started drinking dishwasher detergent
I dont know whats funnier - that, or that we learned that poison control is closed at 2 AM
I just woke up in a puddle of boob sweat. Definitely time to consider a reduction.
i dont understand blimps. what would happen if they collided would they just bounce off or fall to the ground.
dude how high are you right now?
do you think jeeves would know? you do it. ask jeeves.
apparently my insurance doesn't cover road head. Bummer.
I just had someone I don't even know on Facebook message me saying it seems like I drink too much and should slow down.
Pretending to be completely fried so the odd girl next to me doesnt suspect im simply staring at her.
gay sex achievement: unlocked
what
you told me you were going out for groceries!!
You are the jesus of drinking
It wouldn't be New Years Eve if we knew where we would be at midnight
You wanna see what happens when frozen corn meets an unhappy Andrew's face?
My mom just busted me rolling a blunt on her bathroom counter. ...all she said was fuck it it's Christmas
What the fuck happened last night.... I woke up with a bowl half full of ravioli next to my head, reversed on my bed still fully clothed.....
I woke up this morning and had to retrieve my clothes from the flagpole, they were using my boxers as a makeshift rally flag for drinking. Yeah last night was a success.
all my friends are getting married and here i am in a committed relationship with rum
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