who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
I just watched a girl use a tall boy Coors as a rolling pin to make christmas cookies
The remote chance that I may get a blowjob is about the only reason I have a shower every day.
How did a couple beers and monopoly turn into a bottle of vodka and throwing eggs at eachother in the kitchen?
thank you for reminding me that I stumbled into a public place drunk at 9am wearing a chicks pants.
Quick question. What's the protocol on going back to a bar after going home with one of their bartenders?
Go back and try to find another to go home with.
Drinking ketchup directly out of the bottle does not make it tomato juice.
hot boxing the bathroom at chili's. where the fuck are you, it's too big of a box for just one person.
Breakfast Clubbing as Juggalos. I can feel our IQs in freefall.
We ended up at a lesbian bar and all my co-workers tried to get me laid. This is not how I envisioned coming out.
I told him i turn boys gay hoping that would scare him off. Finally i found a way to take advantage of my disability.
Definitely got a blow job in Charles Schwab's bed last night.
I love my job.
You have not lived until you and a ginger miget chick are jumping and waving your arms in a pitch black bathroom to turn on the motion lights. Yes, today I have officially lived.
Waffles and pussy, what else is there?
Congrats, you are the first person our bartender ever met that actually needed wheeled out of a bar in a wheelchair. He said you were his hero.
Randomize
