I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
You lit the bowl with a rolled up paper towel that you ignited on the stove.
Im sick of reading dumb tattoos while having sex
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
Just put a picture of dead dolphins on her wall...told her the oil spill was her fault.
He painted his chest for the game... I just fucked an exclamation point.
I don't have nearly enough visine for the dryness from sticking my head out the window on the freeway for 20 minutes. Child lock me next time.
At least I cut out the pieces of your hair where I braided gum into it last night. Thank me later.
Just drug him and when he wakes up say "You just woke up from a coma, we've been married for 5 years." It'll be like The Vow but fucked up.
It would be awesome if I knew whose teeth these were in my pocket
So that advice that humming stops you from puking? Yeah no, just puked through my nose.
just woke up. hair smells like weed and bbq. shins are bruised. vague memory of us chasing deer at the park at 3 am. fill me in on what exactly happened.
Booze, boobs, blunts and batman. dude, I'm livin' the life.
sometimes i like to lay one the floor and pretend im a carrot.
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
Randomize
