PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
My little brother has some high school girls in my pool, it's like a jailbait buffet in my backyard
She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
According to Glamour magazine, experiencing sexual pleasure helps you live longer. I am dying an early death.
My uncles bleeding, my brother has a black eye and my moms topless in the pool... How was your family cookout?
I'm at the bar alone. Is this how you feel?
I'm having mini little movies in my head. Like for example. You were talking to a blue whale with jazz man sunglasses, but not the ray charles jazz sunglass. More like sunglasses that are round. Anyway, he has a baguette and stupid french hat. And you , you had your harry potter glasses.
It's that thing where you don't have any food so you just drink beer to get your needed calories for the day.
This means I've slept with 2 ppl that live in vans...my life is complete
My bad man. I was at a strip club, and apparently it's like a big deal to take your phone out in one of those places.
I woke up on my girls floor with a pound of muenster cheese in my shirt pocket
For the record you're a very classy lady and your love for and mastery of strap-ons is amazing. I would gladly marry you and father your offspring
yeah, but I wanna be the girl that makes him realize he's 100% gay
I wanna get to the point where I can just send a question mark and get an exclamation point in response
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
Randomize