And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
you cant keep talent like that locked up in a relationship
Come find me please? Im in a ditch.
That doesn't help me much...
I'm right under the moon!
Great. My funeral dress now smells of smoke and disappointing sex.
I found a digiorno pizza in my washing machine.
i'm not accepting baked goods from anyone for awhile. especially after the stalker pie.
everyone thought he was too sick to make it, but he showed up. Ten minutes in and he's doing vodka shots with nyquil chasers
trading diseases for a hangover? that's either a really good decision or a really, really bad one. we'll find out if he wakes up tomorrow
I took 36 pictures of my lava lamp. your weed wins.
do you know where my other puke covered boot is
I like how my motivation to lose weight is so I can wear a nude bikini and get covered in body paint for the tribal party. Priorities.
Giving you good advice and being naked are not mutually exclusive.
Is "I am going to murder you if you keep sending me requests that I cannot fulfill" unprofesh?
I just googled: how soon can I pee on a stick. What is my life coming to.
Well, you started screaming "I dont know you GO AWAY" to your mom when she was holding your hair as you threw up in her garden.
Randomize
