My RA tried to compliment my pong tables design after he confiscated it
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
I'll go out only because I know the starving children in third-world countries would frown upon us if we let an hour of free sangria go to waste...
That still doesn't explain why you thought it was a good idea to paint a cow on my guitar
I knew she was going to get knocked up just by looking at her facebook pics
My right arm is handcuffed to my leg... Please help.
I know what youre going to say and vodka only explains half of my sitation
I got home and laid by the toilet and then alexa laid in the bathtub and sang the preamble while kayla held my hair
We hotboxed his closet and accidentally lit some of his shirts on fire... do we have a fire extinguisher?
Nothing says Panama City like condoms washing up on the shore.
I need to stop getting high and watching documentaries. Wanna go to Japan with me and protest the mass genocide of dolphins?
She swallowed the key to the cuffs, I've been having to explain the pink fuzz all morning.
Everything is a learning experience. Last night we learned why I'm not allowed to bring guys home from the bar....
Dude did you see that video of yourself crying while bathing in vodka on YouTube?
I figured it out! There's blood on the kitchen floor because I fell into the dishwasher. And there's a face dent. And it doesn't work.
Yea.....I saw that happen.
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