Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
I woke up and went to my kitchen naked and decided I wanted a fruit cup. Ate said fruit cup. Look over and notice my male neighbor is staring at me
so i had a hang over on saturday and i stayed in the shower for 4 hours, then crawled out, skimpered to my bed, and some kid i didnt know was sleeping in it
thursday was literally the first time i didnt drunk eat since the bush administration and it was only because i was fucking someones boyfriend. making a mental note to do that more often.
Our kitchen sink faucet is leaking, so I set a pitcher under it to catch water for Kool-Aid tomorrow rather than turn on the faucet. The environment owes me.
He ended up walking out of his bedroom and told me to look at the nonexistent fire he was holding in his hand. Im upset I didn't take those shrooms.
She went home with him because he works at Jimmy John's and his car "smelled like meat"
no, she just came home, mumbled about being a gerbil out of water then ate half cooked chicken nuggets.. normal night
no. i discovered the *exact* amount of drugs i need to do to understand calculus.
Remember that time you gave me a fat lip with your vag? We should do that again!
Actually let's just focus our energy on not getting committed to a psych ward.
So how do I get back in good graces for trying to trade you for superbowl tickets?
all I got out of honors convocation is I've hooked up with a lot of smart guys
I'm not kidding, he literally jumped in the red panda exhibit. I knew this was gonna be a good birthday.
Your mom has reinvented the use of a ping pong ball.
Randomize
