so i saw this homeless guy this morning yelling at a pay phone like chewbacca.
That's what you get for being in filth-adelphia.
What are the signs of a concussion? Please don't freak out.
thats it. im teaching my cat how to use a fire alarm
I think she was eating a cup of ramen noodles while we banged, or had a seizure
I don't understand how these people can do extreme gymnastics and I have problems walking up the stairs.
This is going to be the time I got green body paint on Chris' ceiling all over again...
I found him on the floor in the kitchen eating cheese and tomato. I mean a block of cheese and whole tomatoes, he was alternating. Thats why your cheese has teeth marks.
That bottle of wine took a part of my soul with it.
I am not betting on the failure of any friend that is not you.
Meant to have fun, ended up giving speech about consent to guy at bar. Feminist side feels happy. Orgasms side feels confused and betrayed.
Finally smoked with my brothers, I feel like I just won gold at the Best Older Brother Ever Olympics
So I've been in more fights on one leg than I've had on two.
Also, it was so cold in that bathroom that I saw my crap steaming, a first in my life
O was like, nah, fuck 50-50. My version of bi is that i'm 80% gay, 20% drug-addled decisions. Apparently he's straight on hallucinogens.
i had to win in rock paper scissors, get called a fat whore, and make two dudes get in a fight so we could call next game on the table and you make zero cups. thanks asshole.
Randomize
