She kept saying "I didn't do it" but she was so drunk she forgot her pee was orange from her UTI medicine.
I wrote a list of all my homework due in the next few weeks. I feel I've done enough for tonight.
I don't know if this beer pong partnership can last if you refuse to look me in the eye when we make sweet sweet clutch cup at the same time.
I thought she was being abused so tried to go in at the sympathy angle, but the bruises were from pole dancing. I went in at all angles.
they drunkenly created an obstacle course for the poor hamster and its ball.
I think I'm interested in anyone that recognizes I actually have a pulse
She just laid there, sucking on a piece of steak, with the most content look on her face. Just before she passed out (steak still on her mouth) she said the cat box needed to be emptied
Second time this week margarita night turned homoerotic
he attacked my vagina with the force of a thousand suns
No it was good. I serenaded the holding cell occupants with a fabulous rendition of Making Love out of Nothing at all. It was fucking amazing!
All he gave me was a sore vagina and film suggestions
I worry about your feelings an awful lot for somebody who gets off on making you cry
and i thought it was paint or jizz but it was cheese
please tell me you didnt taste test that
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
Someone should walk up to them and say, "We're sorry, you're too hot to be out here with the other humans."
Randomize
