Getting food. Want anything?
Vagina. Double meat no buns. I have the secret sauce
Taylor Swift is so right about you.
According to my dad, my tongue ring makes people assume I give a lot of blow jobs because, as stated by him "that's what it's for"
you can't get genital warts from dogs can you?
today's thought: if you're naming your fb album "wEdDiNg dAy!!!!!!" you're too young to get married
Thank God. You really dodged a small penis there.
Best idea ever: Giving hobos a beer and having a chugging contest to win another beer. Most fun I have had downtown in a while.
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
Empowerment dancing to Touch Me in the Morning by Diana Ross. Handling this breakup SO well.
I barely even remember him. He is just a distant beard in my past.
Mom called her a cunt. I think that's code for "don't bring her over ever again."
Uhh I just had to break up with a guy who I didn't even know I was dating...
We sexted for four hours straight. Is this really what my life has come to?
You wouldn't happen to know why there's an inflatable monkey riding a mattress on my roof would you?
you should just get a floor plan of your dorm and start checking off rooms.
Randomize
