I stood up and a chip flew out of my shirt and landed in the chip dish. I just walked away.
I had to go to the bank to confirm purchases made on 10/31/09 because they were signed as Lady Gaga
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
you flashed my boyfriend last night so i tackled you to the floor. you may be a bit sore.
There is a hole in her door about 2 inch in diameter. You may see me on YouPorn
You know how hard it is to play cool while not drowning and appreciating a pair of butts at the same time?
Is "sorry I booted you out mid-fuck last night" a good icebreaker?
Its a sick, sad, world when parents get more ass then you.
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
I managed to get through my meeting without throwing up in someone else's office, so there's that for an accomplishment today.
I literally stopped banging her when my ESPN app alerted me that the Spurs had won. That's how much I hate Lebron. I would rather watch him cry in the post game interviews than get it in
He wants to buy us a microwave. Clearly the man is going to fix my life.
Someone left a middle school yearbook here. I recognized one kid from banging his mom last year.
Plan b and 5 hour enegery breakfast of a champion
I'm waiting for you in a manthong right now.
Randomize
