my professor just told me i smelt like a brewery infront of my whole class b4 my final presentation
Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
I kept telling myself all night that it was completely okay for me to lose all sense of my morals because it was my birthday.
he broke up with her mid blow job, and somehow convinced her to finish. I want his life
I have reached the state of intoxication where it is now a requirement to sit while peeing.
Sunshine is the equivalent of sprinkling whore pellets on campus.
There's a guy here who is improvising his own shadow dance on a table against the wall, in case you're wondering how my night is going
got into a verbal altercation with Luke Harangoty last night over a table. Called him a cross-eyed fuck and got the table.
he apologises profusely for spelling mistakes in his texts but doesn't care about cheating on me. priorities
i just found my fake in the snow. LIFE IS AWESOME
He also reminds me slightly of a pirate which i find strangely attractive
I HATE HIM SO MUCH I HOPE HE GETS IN SOME WEIRD ACCIDENT WHICH MAKES IT IMPOSSIBLE FOR HIM TO NUT
You act like tequila is some sort of sex juice
Guy from the bar last night left his number on my waterbill on the counter, at the bottom he put don't forget I can hook you up at Little Caesars I work their part time.
You sure know how to pick em.
Randomize
