Heyy I kind of wanted to apologize and excuse myself for last night. I feel like that was a little much. I just met you. That's why I don't like tequila. Haha
i'm in the sorta mood where i wanna be that crying, drunk girl who will hook up with anyone that tells her she's pretty
I know its small, but please -- stop calling it my "weenis".
This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
i keep forgetting that not all of my female friends are bisexual.
Oh my god my life; so much cake and so little sex
btw when he was trying to sleep i was apparently poking him in the face w my 'flipper' slurring random manatee facts
The girl behind me in psych just tapped me on my shoulder to tell me there was a condom wrapper in my hood.
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
I accidentally told my mom "the reason I didn't answer your call is because my phone was in my pants, on the floor"
He complimented the perfect handprints you left on each of my ass cheeks.Thanks.
2015 is the year I FINALLY ALMOST had enough dick to satisfy me.
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
I tried to fuck you in my bathroom while my parents were in the next room. I am a clusterfuck of fun.
Randomize
