Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
watchout when you come home, dougs at the top of the stairs naked eating doritos
I just realized last night I drunk-bought a flight to Florida for this weekend...kinda torn between the price and the potential of awesomeness
you said you couldnt let go of the fence because your hand was molding to it.
The baby slept soo good last night. Its like he knows the importance of me being intoxicated all weekend.
I knew shit got real when the pinapple was gone and people were just passing around the core and gnawing on it.
Shame should no longer be a word in your vocabulary.
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
Driving to get a preg test with my ex, wearing my unicorn hat
You are so not ready for motherhood
he told me he didn't know whether he was gonna puke, pass out, or cum. i don't know if i should be flattered or offended.
I was giving him a handjob in the woods and a family walked by
I had a dream that we had an entire sofa made out of cocaine.
Hey. I hope you have enough room in your car for me and a Honda civic front bumper.
you were just in my dream and you looked at me and said "Christmas is cold." I think you're wasted even in my dreams.
Almost gave the delivery guy a 34 dollar tip. That high
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