i friday night watching house. god, i need a life, friends, and a legitimate fake id.
My roommate found me crawling down the hallway as she was on her way to her morning class. Its time for a new semester.
it was my 21st birthday. took an old mans walker so i could stay till last call. reasonable right?
It was honestly like finding a clitoris in a haystack.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but I did not stop moving last night. If tequila gives me that extra push to have an active lifestyle, so be it.
I definitely paid for a case and a fifth and all I got was 6 beers and a crown and coke. Wtf. Bar math sucks
Are we still banned from the library?
Ps there is nothing more humbling in the world than havin to watch cheaper by the dozen on the waiting room tv while getting the morning after pill at the drs. Nothing
I was dressed in monkey onesie serving people vodka jelly with a spoon...
It's like bringing a chick home from the bar the night before and waking up to thinking you are about to go another round... Just to wake up and find she's already left...
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
You know you had a good night when your wearing you best friends pants to work the next day
I don't trust his life but I trust his penis.
I think I'm just gonna exercise my lungs and fingers. With bong hits and crochet. BECAUSE I AM A REAPONSIBLE ADULT DAMMIT!!
Nothin much, just sipping warm franzia from a plastic valentines wine glass while wrapped in my Mexican blanket listening to sappy country songs and mourning my lack of a love life. Hbu?
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