We video chatted for almost two hours. But I woke up with puke on my keyboard. The question of the day: were we still chatting when I vommed? No idea.
I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
Life after highschool has not been kind to her. She looked fatter than Luke Wilson's face in those AT&T commercials.
My sister got her picture in the pub crawl section of the paper today and my dad said to me "why can't you be more like her?"
Just crossed the line from casual pregrame to public intoxication. Shotgunning in a bus shelter.
All I wanted was a quiet evening to masturbate and eat cake and instead you ruined it by bringing girls over.
We spilled a whole bottle of mouth wash and then proceeded to roll around and make out in it. At least I smell minty fresh.
I chugged vodka from a 15 ft snorkel. What the fuck did you do with your life today?
Nothing is working I'm going to die alone and on hold with a State Farm representative
he pissed the bed, like I literally woke up and he was pissing right beside me. With the electric blanket he's lucky he didn't get electrocuted
Your "whiskey dick" is glorious but also terrifying
Also, feel like I need to install a nanny cam to remind myself what I did the night before.
Two of my dealers just made friends at this party. Do you think one will be pissed if I buy from the other or should I just go 50/50?
I did not pay that kind of money so that It could be hidden. that bra needs to shine in glory so that it can be seen by the world.
You tried to see how many socks you can stuff in yor mouth and I just put on a damp sock. Is this what bestfriends have come to these days???
Randomize
