I reminded them that I didn't puke and I cleaned yours up! So huh!
Glitter + Penis = Best. Idea. Ever.
well he showed me a naked baby picture and i was right it hasn't grown
I would get the one fuckin stripper that's a lesbian. THE ONLY ONE
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
$645 later, she's throwing up in my washroom and asking for a cab. Hooker are soooo much cheaper.
did you see me getting spanked by that lady cop who was a guy?
wow thanks for pushing me towards an older man
you gotta start somewhere if you're going to be a trophy wife
He invites me over too FucK and i wind up eating 6 jimboys tacos with his roommates. While he waited in his room. Maybe next time
she's sitting there like the lesbian godfather. A cigarette in one hand and a titty in the other.
You were supposed to be my wingman and all you kept to her friend was "kill it with fire"..
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
Which one of you fucks put a bounty out on my brother's virginity?
What the hell happened to the sandwich meat I just bought?
After you smoked, you made 8 ham sandwiches.
Guess that explains the mysterious disappearance of the bread...
Well he waved at me as he was leaving so he def noticed the staring, and by staring i mean blatant eye fucking from across the bar..
Randomize
