Oh shit, I think we need to get you a hobby that doesn't include penises
I saw a sign that said worlds largest frying pan next exit. Way to do your fucking part Iowa.
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
I have had more skin than food in my mouth the last three days
Happiness for him is a different happiness than you can supply cuz you have life standards, morals and goals that dont include the bar or beer everynight.
Im pretty sure at one point a very high you yelled, with actual tears in your eyes, "im not wrestling with you anymore, you dont respect my safe word!!"
Either she's trying to smother me and failing, or she just has a really bad sense of where her tits should go.
He started a convo with me by saying that we went to high school together and then recommended I try meth.
While we were having sex he asked me if I wanted to get wingstop after. I think I found my future husband.
Come here I'm naked
And I want mozzarella sticks
i swear to god it was like we were fucking in 9 dimensions
Last night was just a whirlwind of Mario Brothers and sex.
I invited him to my hotel room via snapchat. I'm one hell of a classy bitch
Currently tripping balls and watching Pink Floyd the wall and I'm crying during it. If this isn't a self realization then I don't know what to tell you.
I just bought a mini nerf gun so he could make a bowl out of it, I deserve the fuck buddy of the year award!
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