dude. i was so high. i watched shrek in russian.
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
Whatever is fine with me, as long as I am dressed in green and end up shitfaced.
Europeans suck. I just gave him head and somehow i am the one paying for the coffee
he's paying for my abortion by participating in an alcohol study. dont try to tell me we wouldn't be classy parents
I'm not mad at you for letting me use my air mattress as a toilet, i'm mad at you for letting me lay back down on it.
Exactly, there's no such thing as commitment at foam n' glow
Just so you know, your wedding is in the same place I gave my first bj.
What?! Why else would they put table cloths on a table if not for discreet oral sex? That's why they were invented! Read a book...
Idk dude but he said something bout his "dick was gonna be so tan" then he jus jumped out of the car
Do you think accidently including this month's Credit Card statement in my application will keep me from getting into grad school?
Depends ... when did you purchase your vibrator?
Letting Freddy Krueger eat me out = HAPPY HALLOWEEN TO ME!!!
IF I CANT STRIP TO SANTA BABY THEN WHY EVEN HAVE CHRISTMAS.
I'm stuck in a tree and request your assistance ASAP
People like you and me aren't meant to go this long without having sex
Randomize
