That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
after everytime she pucked, she insisted on us all giving her high fives
You deserve yourself a blunt and a build a bear.
we tried to steal a tractor last night. you should have come out.
Put you drinking hat aside for Tuesday. My buddy is bartending!
I just puked in my drinking hat.
After all the hair products he's stolen from me, he better fucking be gay.
An image of us stuck like that like Pompeii comes to mind. A wonder for future anthropologists
Why did you make me get in the car with you and then not give me a ride? I woke up in a bar with a blanket on me.
Just remember, Dont make worse choices than american flag pants to your own birthday party
His roommate walked in then asked "well did you at least finish". What a way to start your birthday
I get stoned and write a 15 page history report in two hours. She gets stoned and cries because she "doesn't know which shade of pink is the real one".
I NEED TO TAKE A FUCKING BREAK. MY VAGINA IS SMOKING.
90% sure the total babe I have been talking to all night has a kid. Ugh, so sad right now.
Im so high
As I was blowing him, he proceeded to tell me that his friend who I blew years ago gave me a five star review on my BJ skills. And, he agrees.
Atta girl.
I guess I'm famous. Hot lesbian was WARNED about me. Still hooked up with her.
I'll pay you to teach me.
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