She said her name was "party"
What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
we'll hang out once this whole, "your friends are robbers and drug addicts" thing blows over with my parents.
its like the voldemort of pregnancies, we don't talk about it
I don't know how this happened but I got an email thanking me for being a Waffle House regular. HOW DO THEY KNOW?? Maybe I need to stop going there shitfaced.
You are like a prophet. It's amazing how many people you convince to be lesbians.
She told me I was lying in front of her toilet for an hour saying "lasers."
Before you even think your day was worse than mine, I had to disinfect and and stitch another dude's penis after his prince Albert got ripped out by an angry chick.
So half of us were already throwing up outside when the Ukrainians ask us if we're ready to start partying yet. I love this country.
Did you high five my face last night?
Yes. Yes I did.
is it too much for me to say that i have a ziplock bag with ice in it in my underwear?
I lost my bra, he lost his virginity. Seems like a fair trade off.
who says I'm not relevant to the kids today? Just had snapchat sex, blows the roof off aim cyber sex
Wearing my one sleeve dress...thought you'd like to know I shaved ONE armpit lol
Randomize
