I would have done the walk of shame but I couldnt walk
Odds of those being real?
One in who gives a fuck
No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
And then she said "sorry if my vagina smells like fish, it's just active."
just puked in a purse in the store. some girl asked if i was gonna buy it now and i laughed and asked her why id want a bag some dude just puked in. her face looked like she saw the devil.
She forgot my birthday again. How do you forget something that came out of your vagina???
Sorry about the weird guinea pigs text. I was drunk and they were freaking me out
Does it qualify as sexting if you're both pretending to be fictional characters?
I'm not sure whether to be proud of you or weirded out.
During sex his mom asks from the other side of the door, "Do you like avocados?" Who doesn't like avocados?
He showed up riding a bike blasting the ghostbusters theme song. His name was Lasercat. Im in love.
I don't care what you say about him, his cock is the stuff dreams are made of.
I wrote an entire paper in under an hour about The Nightmare Before Christmas. I was also high as shit and pretty sure I dedicated half the page to the animation but still.
I woke up naked with a duck on my head. I think something went horribly wrong.
If your talking about a poncho I WANT ONE
Randomize
