this ugly chick literally cried last night because i wouldnt let her give me head
I wish my dick could take responsibilities for his own actions
Just filled up my pledge keg goblet with coffee at bp. They can judge all they want. At least I'm not killing baby dolphins.
We're too lazy too send a pic of out balls. Just assume this is a pic of our balls and respond accordingly.
She hash tagged the word blow job in her text. Tonight's going to be good.
My body is a temple...that happens to be able to get me free Patron shots at the bar
As far as drugs go, alcohol has all the elegance and precision of hitting yourself in the head with a hammer.
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
You should make us a hot pocket to split while I go throw up.
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
We have hung out 5 times and only had sex 3 of those times. I'd call that friendship
I saw an episode of cops that had one of my ex husbands on it.
I can't hangout tonight, I have a phone sex appointment at 10
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
Randomize