Do u think she knows her nickname is the oompa loompa
Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
The Ukrainian kid just told me that our econ professor wants to bone me. Please tell me that phrase means something different in Eastern Europe.
we talked for like an hour, i feel like we really bonded. i mean i was simultaneously giving him head but you get the point.
I'm not sure what happened last night but I woke up next to him and I was wearing nothing but my grandpa's diabetic socks, so I'm letting that fill in the blanks.
In other news, shitting yourself is not an acceptable way to start a Thursday.
I was ashamed to still be in my green tank this morning, but there's a guy here in full on bright green pants and a green blazer. He looks like the lucky charms guy stretched out at drunker than usual. Now, I fade into the background.
dude, you declined head because you wanted to tell her about how you put cinnamon in your weed. also, we're low on Chef Boyardee
In the last 3 months, I've slept with an ex,someone single, someone in a relationship, someone married, and someone divorced. I should get some type of grown up girl scouts badge.
We always end up having sex in random places after class. I need to stop letting this dude borrow my pens.
He gave me the award for most entertaining blow job. That should count for something.
Young lesbians are the worst. And also what got me through high school, sooooo
As he was going down on me, I looked over his shoulder and said "ohh a Christian mingle commercial is on"
my nurturing instincts told me to take his clothes off
Do you think the hole in the ceiling will count against our security deposit?
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