We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
i want two things in life...emily to stop talking and a block of cheese.
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
i stopped calling them hangovers and started calling mornings a long time ago.
She is ok w me having sex for money. Just gotta find rich grandmas.
We found you in the middle of the road chucking gravel because "the house was too far away".
Your lack of dedication to alcohol is forcing me to drink with my ex husband. U suck
Wow. I feel like a bad friend. My fuckbuddy wished you a happy birthday before I did. The reality of that just hit me.
I just almost said to a customer "P as in Pussy"
I am on top of a rooftop peeing on your freedom
I just need like a magic vacuum to suck everything out of me and then an IV to put good stuff back in
This was the first time I've ever pushed myself until I vomited. Sorry, random couple laying on a dock at 8:30am. I would have picked a better spot so you didn't have to watch/listen to me vomit, but you guys were being MAD quiet. I had no idea you were there.
Is it possible to break your brain with drugs?
Why did my mother make you get naked?
Im too stoned for my mom to be picking up hitch hikers. Help.
Randomize
