perhaps when you are drinking red wine from a tall glass with a straw it is time to call it a night.
Just smoked a bowl with the exterminator. I think my day is more productive.
He managed to light the Jello on fire...
judging by the cake all over the hall, my neighbors had a pretty successful thursday too.
note to self, drunkenly bedazzeling the silverware was a stupid fucking idea
I think showering with 5 people and a half gallon of vodka was one of the best decisions we have ever made.
Granted I did fall into a pond wearing your dress, but I did save a frog in the process so I think it was worth it.
No, this is a senior booty call. It cannot be ignored.
if I open my eyes, my head will explode. that hungover.
Oh shit. The hangover. It has taken 20 mins and 5 attempts to tie my shoelaces
I guess "Ass Fun Friday" is not a thing no matter how many times I say it or bring it up in conversation...
he's been 21 for 38 minutes and he's already trying to fist fight this dude over his girl
awwwww babys first drunken mistake
And don't worry, I have a great track record of rallying after a casual midday blackout.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score onr for mom.
Started dabbing in blow again because he always hated that I did it. Yuh I’m doing drugs but at least I’m doing me?
Randomize
