Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
oh man. maybe i should puke on his dick? just to test how much he loves me?
Do you how many people I've successfully loaded into a Mazda Miata? Six. Six people. How? Strategically.
The more I stare at her and block out what she's actually saying with thoughts of what she could be saying, the more interested I become
There's somethin not right about having to take the batteries out of your 27 year old boyfriends gameboy to use in your vibrator
Rule #127: If your going to try fuck a married guy, you gotta be hotter then his wife; diet starts today.
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
I take your giggles as a yes to operation McLaxitives?
It was a taxi full of fist pumps and chanting to "face down, ass up". It was that 1% that makes my job worth it.
She's comparing the feel of breasts to shredded cabbage. Weirdest. Grandmother. Ever.
In 2014 only three boys have seen my boobs so far
at any given day I am at least 60% invested in my work. today I am staggered around 3.5%
I wrote a list of things I enjoy doing. So far it says "get high and go to museums."
I'm covered in jizz and the toll booth lady knew it
Sitting naked, eating lucky charms with rain boots on
Randomize
