Circus confirmed... Jello shots before 9 pm are not cocktails for sucess
you were chalanging people to drink the "worlds biggest jager bomb" - a VASE of Redbull and a PINT of Jager... is it no wonder you dont remember anything?
We were busted for public indecency in the back of my car in the parking lot. This time we were just reading my Cosmo magazine.
we need a dd. For wednesday. At lunch. What are we doing with our lives?
succeeding
Your dignity remains intact. He, on the other hand, is completely convinced he slept with your cat.
She's walking around topless with a bottle of red wine, crying and singing showtune ballads. This is actually an improvement.
Is it possible to have pulled a muscle in my neck from passing out with my head in a bucket?
during charades she pointed to herself and you guessed 'girl who wants to fuck me'
Finals are done.. I just wanna get drunk and pretend I'm a seahorse.
We found him in the neighbors shed using a bicycle as a blanket. We just left him there.
I may or may not already be in your hot tub when you get home. I have a key to your house and no shame.
He gave me the "find somebody who wants to date you for who you are" speech while I walked around the house asking people for pants.
The party was Hollywood themed and I won an oscar for "finest ass in a leading role"
My Sexting was not on an AP level
Well now you know my birthday fantasy: gangbang consisting of men wearing NPR pledge t-shirts.
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