Pat told us he showed us his penis because he's "a nice guy".
how many princess gummy vitamins will it take to negate last nights drinking binge?
I bought a nasal spray, my nose needs to be in order by the weekend
While he was going down his phone rang and he answered saying I'll call you later I'm eating.
All I know is that if a letter starts with "I'm aware you jerked off in the bathroom last night," I don't want to finish reading it.
The goblet must only be used for good. And vodka. And anything t-pain would be proud of.
Does he not understand that naked slip and slide needs supervision after dark?!
I think the pivotal moment was when we used the see and say as a drinking game with shots of whiskey. It was all downhill after that.
He asked if I smoke and I said "only fools like you on the basketball court!" Then I started crying. I think I'm about to have my period.
I seriously told a stripper I would hold her hand when she goes to get ass implants.
He said I was cute and he handed me a stuffed bear from his car. I don't care that he was 80, I named it Hector.
Give me an out of order sign and caution tape and we can have sex practically anywhere.
I'm disease and pregnancy free. This is an Easter for the books!
This German chick looked me up and down for a while. Then she grabbed my crotch, let go after a few seconds, and said "you vill do". I think I'm gonna like tonight.
everytime he speaks i want to fuck him less. i just wanna tell him to shut up and take his pants off and we could both be happy.
Randomize
