What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
Last night was an abortion. I might need a publicist.
Quoting wale wont save you from herpes
(917) i just came from walking.
haha you just came from walking?
i DID NOT walk around with my knees bent and my hands behind my back with long spandex and underarmour pretending to be Apollo Ono
I don't know what happened last night but I woke up this morning with "wolf pack" tattooed on my knuckles.
I went around and congratulated every guy that had a beard for having one
Goddamn tequila
BTW he text me to text him later after the concert to hang out. Im prepping my bed but I should know I shouldn't count my dicks before they hatch
Just had empanadas for breakfast while watching Wall-e with my yesterday's one night stand mother AND grandmother.
I'm gay. Congratulations to whoever had January 2014 in their pool.
Hey so I got my period
Thank god I wasn't ready to deal with sober you for 9 months
Charging my vibrator at work. Pray to god I don't forget it!!!
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
if I was a good friend this would be the time that i would remind you that you have a boyfriend
Getting a smaller wine glass hasn’t changed the amount I drink—it just means I get more steps each day. Cheers to health!
Randomize