i will soon be in a relationship on fb
you!?
me and your mom. i mean, lisa.
you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
Baconater + red wine = first meal of the day
Tonight we are playing Scuba-Keg. Getting keg now. I'll explain when i get home.
so i gave him head in the movie theater last night. thought we were alone til I heard the clapping from the other side of the theater after he'd finished.
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
They were lying down in the parking garage pretending to be speed bumps...
the arrest was probably divine intervention, cause i think we were heading to an ill-advised threesome.
He said "ride me pocahontas" while I was on top of him last night
She bent the beer can with her tongue. I'm scared of what she'll do to me
well on a positive note i hear those vitamins you take while pregnant do wonders for your nails
You sucked on the drag queens heel. It got that rough.
I'm trying on my bridesmaid dress so that I can determine what will need to be done to achieve getting fucked while wearing it.
Would it be sad if I made a blanket fort to get drunk in till the power came back?
He left weed in my bong for me this morning. What a guy.
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